Weaning works!

Who would have thought? Weaning does work! We spent the week talking about how on Friday (4 more days, 3 more days...) the bosoms would go night-night when it was dark. We got a special night-time cup for water.

The fun started Friday night. Honey went down at 8pm like usual. She woke up at 2 and cried for an hour. We talked about how we don't nurse at night anymore and the bosoms were sleeping. She stood at the door, and I put her back in bed. We rocked and I sang. After about 45 minutes she drank a some milk from her bottle and cried a little longer. After about an hour she fell back asleep in my arms. We snuggled for the rest of the night. When she woke again at 5:30 it was getting light outside so she nursed for while and went back to sleep.

Sat night was better. She sent down and woke at 10:30. She cried for 45 minutes and I carried her around the house, just doing laps and singing. She went back to sleep and we got back in bed. At 2:30 she woke again, drank some milk from her bottle and went back to sleep. No tears, no trying to nurse, only about 7-10 minutes of wakefulness.

Sunday night was amazing. She went to sleep at the usual time (8pm). And woke at 3:45. She has NEVER slept that long on her own. I was in my bed, she was in hers. When she woke up, I went in to her room. She drank some milk from her bottle and went right back to sleep. I stayed with her until about 5:30. She woke at 7 for the morning.

I'm afraid to be too excited. I don't want to jinx myself. But I'm so happy that it seems to be working. The fact that she has so much language really helps. There were tears, but i was there the whole, reassuring her that even though we are not nursing, we can still cuddle at night and I'm still there for her.

We'll see how tonight goes. If everything continues to go so smoothly, I'll transition her to a bottle of water, rather than milk. I'd like to have something that can stay in her bed, so we don't have to mike a midnight fridge stop.

What I don't want is for her to feel abandoned. This has been a big part of our relationship, but it is time for change. My little baby, getting so much bigger.

Next up- work updates.

Weaning plan

So it is time to wean Honey. My plan was to be done by her 2nd birthday. that time is almost there and i need to get my head straight about how to go about this.

Step 1:
Don't offer, don't refuse. We'll start this today. I'm not really sure how much she asks to nurse and how much I offer it up. this will help me figure it out.
Step 2:
No more in-public nursing. This one isn't such a big deal. I've mostly stopped doing this anyway.
Step 3:
Start the discussion about no more at night in prep for the weekend. This weekend (Friday) we'll start with the no more after the sun goes down. Need to get my language down for that one. I'd like to be consistent with what I say every night.

For the next week I'll try these steps out and see where that gets us.

Anger Sharks part 2

Oh my. It has been a long time. And the anger sharks have gotten worse. And I haven't run and I haven't written and my reading has fallen off. What has happened to me?

We did go on a vacation with Lion's family. It was wonderful, if not particularly restful. But I'm back at the grind again. The hospital has hired a new person for the full time position. She starts next week. Not soon enough!

Honey is going through some kind of crazy developmental thing. She is unbelievably active and so so funny. But she has stopped sleeping. It takes her forever to go down at night, and then she is up for hours in the middle of the night.

Plan of attack:
1. Schedule appt with crazy dr.
2. Back to running. I'll take Honey to the gym tonight.
3. Write 250 words every day. I like a tangible number. Reading is good, but it isn't helping me move forward.
4. create a plan for weaning. I'm feeling done, and I'm about dried up. But Honey still depends on it for comfort. I need to implement new techniques.

Goals for March:
1. 10 pages of lit review
2. plan for experimental pilot data collection, with completed stim gen routine and playout routine
3. get back in to exercise habit
4. No more drinking. It helps calm me down and I don't want to use it as a crutch.

Anger Sharks

So I have anger sharks. I don't know what the term came from (maybe some movie?), but it is such an apt description for me. Little things set me off, and I just can't control it. They were biting hard Sunday morning. I'm better now, but they are getting stronger.

I think it might be related to my exercise habits. When Honey got sick a few weeks ago i quit going to the gym early in the morning. The she started day care and i wanted to be home in the morning to get her ready. All of a sudden it is 3 weeks later and I haven't run, I haven't done a sit-up, I haven't even played on the fit.

That changed today. I was up at 5 and the gym by 5:20. By getting up even earlier, I can run and shower and still be home by 6:45. That give us 30 minutes to get out the door. It is doable, as long as Honey wakes up while I am gone. If she happens to sleep in, then I have to wake her up. It hurts me to do that, so often on those days we are going to be late.

But writing is going well, and reading is going better. I'm making real progress here. Lion and Honey leave for a family trip this weekend. My plan is to get my statement of purpose and methods sections written. That way my advisers and i can figure out where I need to beef up for the lit review. That will be my fun time in Mexico! My plan is to have my prospectus meeting before April, so I need to get all of this writing done. And then I need to do some pilot data collection. That should be fun!

This day care thing is really helping. Our house is cleaner, we are better fed, I love riding the bus with Honey, and Lion is getting some skiing in. Kat, PBC, Lemon, UJ, and Honey are going to the Science Museum today in Denver. They asked if I would mind. As long as yo9u all are comfortable with 3 kids, I think Honey will love it!

And I have my application for PP. Now to fill it out and turn it in. I did my good dead Friday, but the weekend was pretty self centered. I need to figure something out that can be done daily, but doesn't require too much time or too much money. Isn't that the story of everyone's life?

Reconciliation

Reconciliation. It is an idea that has been troubling me recently. It goes along with my feeling that I need to be doing more to help my community. On NPR last night they were doing a story about the families in China that were affected by the storms and landslides 8 months ago. They interviewed a woman who had a3 month old baby who was living in a tent. her husband was a laborer and there was no money to get housing. There was no running water, no electricity, no sanitation system. How can this happen? How can we let that happen? The interviewer asked the woman how much it would cost to build a house. She said $500 and that it would take 10 years for them to save that much.

Lion and I are frugal people. We don't spend much on material things, but we do have cell phones, and cable TV, and netflix. We spend more than $500 a year at our local brewhouse. How can I pretend that this isn't happening? That there are places where children are not able to sleep in safety, that parents must choose between food and shelter, that individuals must fight so very hard just for survival.

I hear these stories, I think about the problems in my own community, and I boggle. Where to start? Where can I begin? How can I reconcile my very blessed life without contributing to the greater good? I'll never make tons of money. Professors don't go in to academics because it makes you rich. I love what I do, I love my family, but I need to do something to make this world a better place. I need to go to bed at night knowing that I did something today that made a difference for the people beyond my household.

I've started by printing off the PP volunteer application. I'll start there. This can be my one thing today. I'm adding it to my goals. Do 1 thing daily to make the world better. Reconcile my life with my world.

Now I just need to figure what I can do...

Weekend in review

Didn't get much work done over the weekend, as Honey has come down with (another) cold. Running a fever, runny nose, cough, and sore throat. At least we think the throat is sore. Hard to tell, but she cries every time she coughs, so something must hurt. If not better by tomorrow, off to the Dr we go. And to decide about going to child care this week. If she is better tonight she'll go, otherwise we'll cancel. We have narrowed it down to the Friday morning indoor gym Lion and Honey go to. She keeps getting sick Sat morning, so that would give it a 24 hour incubation period. They are going to find something else to do on Fridays for the next couple of weeks.

I did get lots done around the house. Cleaned the laundry room. It was time, as evidenced by the amount of dust and dog hair in there. I'm getting a new (to me) solid wood 8 drawer filing cabinet. Hopefully it will get moved in this week so I can get the office whipped in to shape.

One of the things I have been mulling over is my on-going desire to do some volunteer work. I'd really like to get involved at Planned Parenthood. It supports many of the causes I believe in, and I'd like for Honey to see me working for a better world. But how to fit it in? Where to find the time? I think I'll contact them and see if the could use evening support, maybe from 7:30-9:30 one night a week.

Finally Friday

Gearing up for a big weekend. Trees are getting trimmed, and I have lots to read to get ready for writing. I have been getting up early and reading, but not so much for the running. Will go tomorrow.

Honey's first week of daycare was great. Cat and I have very similar parenting philosophies, which is great. She and I had a good discussion over email about helping Honey deal with the "mines". Everything is hers, and she has gotten over-zealous in protecting it. We are working on the respect for yourself and others thing, but her language isn't quite there. Cat had some great points for making what we are saying accessible to Honey.

Here is part of what Cat had to say...

What I do is acknowledge what the child wants or is feeling, staying as positive as possible. Yesterday, when Honey feared PBC or Lemon was going to take a toy from her, I said, "Honey is playing with the doll. Honey wants space to play with the doll." I'm really big on children's right to space, and I use that word a lot. Next, I make sure that the child sees that her space really is protected, showing her that another child is just walking by or giving that other child a different toy.

Yesterday, Honey walked up to Lemon and PBC several times, pointing to a toy they were holding and saying, "Mine!" So I acknowledged what she wanted and said, "Honey wants a turn with the dinosaur." Then I described the situation, "Lemon is playing with the dinosaur." Finally I introduced a solution, "Let's get you another dinosaur," or "Right now, Lemon is throwing the bear for Doggy and next it's your turn!"

Both of these point to what I am trying to implement at home. We do work on problem solving with her, with the idea that at some point she'll be able to take over the idea generation. Hopefully we are giving her the tools to do that, while at the same time giving her clear boundaries and respecting her own personal boundaries. The language above does all of that. It gives Honey direction, shows her that we see her point, and teaches her respect for others.
Good stuff.